36 Funny Perimenopause Quotes and Jokes to Lighten Your Day

There’s something about approaching the tough stuff in life with a sense of humor—and that includes perimenopause. When you’re suddenly dripping in sweat (in an air-conditioned room, no less), so irritated you might just up and walk out your door and head into the woods to start a new life, or have had what feels like your millionth case of brain fog, some women find it helps to laugh it off a bit. (And we couldn’t agree more.)

That’s why perimenopause quotes, midlife memes, and menopause jokes can be a true mood-booster. At the very least, they may make you feel validated and remind you you’re never alone in this journey. Plus, when we share perimenopause memes and jokes with one another, it underlines the fact that we’re all going through it as midlife women. In that way, humor becomes about connection—though it’s certainly not a substitute for care. 

Here’s to laughing and sharing with each other. Laughter isn’t the only medicine you need, though, so if you have perimenopause symptoms disrupting your daily life that could benefit from support, be sure to talk with a menopause-informed clinician, like one at Midi, about how to get the care you need and finally feel like yourself again. 

Perimenopause Funny Quotes That Make Midlife Feel Lighter

Perimenopause isn’t for the faint of heart. Good thing it comes for midlife women who, at this stage, have little left to fear—except for those days when you forget your portable fan. Here are some funny perimenopause quotes found across the internet that hit on this “WTF is happening” stage:

• “I wish Judy Blume would write a book about Margaret going through perimenopause. We could use that right about now.”
• “One minute, you’re organizing your glitter pens in a Caboodle. The next, you’re carrying a portable fan everywhere. Life comes at you fast.”
• “Navigating perimenopause feels like folding a fitted sheet.”
• “If you owned a Lisa Frank folder, a Caboodle, AND a crimping iron, you might be in perimenopause.”

On your new IDGAF vibe:

• “You grew up learning about breakups from Taylor Swift; I learned from Alanis Morissette. We are not the same.”
• “Today I heard someone call perimenopause ‘cougar puberty’—and suddenly life makes perfect sense.”

Hot Flash Humor: Quotes for When Your Internal Thermostat Quits

Is that sweat dripping down your face—or are those tears of frustration? Who can really tell the difference at this point? And if you laugh about thermostat wars with your partner or thoughts of flashing the entire train to relieve the sudden heat, we definitely don’t blame you. That’s why we can all relate to these internet-favorite quotes:

• “I’m still hot. It just comes in flashes now!”
• “Is it hot out here or is it just me?”
• “My internal thermostat has only 2 settings… 1. Hypothermia 2. Eternal fires of hell.”
• “Sweat is just my glitter.” 
• “I don’t have hot flashes…. I have short, private vacations in tropical-like conditions!”

There’s no shortage of hot flash jokes out there because hot flashes are one of the most common symptoms of menopause. In fact, 75% to 80% of women report having hot flashes. 

While dressing in layers and toting a portable fan with you at all times can help you cool off when the heat rises, there are good treatments, too, so you don’t have to suffer in sweaty silence. 

Botanical therapies and non-hormonal or hormonal prescriptions can all help manage hot flashes. No blasting the car’s air conditioning directly at your face again.

Brain Fog and Memory Quotes for the Glasses-on-Your-Head Era

Your reading glasses might be on your head. Or they might have fallen off in the freezer when you stuck your head inside. Heck, you might have thrown them in the trash by accident. But the good news is: You still remember the name, birthday, and phone number of your high school crush(es). These quotes speak to that experience:

• “This can’t be the same brain I used to memorize everyone’s home phone number with.” 
• “If I had a dollar for every time I got distracted, I wish I had some ice cream.”
• “I’ve expanded my skills. Now I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.”
• “You can phone a friend but she has brain fog, too.” 
• “Not to brag or anything, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.”
• “Anybody else’s ability to remember song lyrics from the ’80s exceed their ability to remember why they went upstairs?”
• “Better send myself an email so I don’t forget…. Oh look! I’ve got an email.”

We’ve all walked into a room without a clue as to why or subbed in something completely nonsensical like “hand ankles” for a common word like “wrists.” During perimenopause, so many factors contribute to cognitive blips, such as mood shifts, sleep loss, night sweats, and hormonal changes. If brain fog is affecting your work or daily life, reach out to a healthcare professional, such as a Midi clinician, for evaluation and support in making lifestyle changes for clearer thinking.

Mood Swing Quotes 

We dare you to look at us the wrong way, show us a commercial from the ’90s, or play Sarah McLachlan. We might rage, we might cry, we might rage cry. Who knows? And you know what: That’s what makes us extra fun to be around right now. Here are some just-for-fun quotes on the subject you might find relatable: 

• “Just so we’re clear about this…I’m under no obligation to stay in the same mood for any length of time.”
• “Don’t talk to me until my hormones stabilize.”
• "I cried at a commercial, laughed until I snorted, and then napped. Welcome to perimenopause."

While it may feel nice to laugh about, remember: Mood changes are not personality flaws. Your hormones are on a roller coaster, taking your mood along for the ride. Tailored solutions—including hormone therapy, non-hormonal medications, supplements, or lifestyle strategies—can be vital in easing mood symptoms. Sometimes, though, midlife stress and obligations can weigh heavily on your mental health. When that happens, emotional support in therapy or with medication management may be right for you. Talk with a licensed mental health professional or a Midi clinician for guidance unique to you.

Sleep, Night Sweats, and 3 a.m. Perimenopause Quotes 

You’re up and awake. What’s new? Used to be, you were up late having fun—now you’re wide awake for other reasons. Fellow women in perimenopause know that all too well:

• “I really think that tossing and turning at night should be considered exercise.” 
• “Dear 3 a.m., we have got to stop meeting this way. I’d much rather sleep with you.” 
• “Do you know that awesome feeling when you get into bed, fall right asleep, stay asleep all night, and wake up feeling refreshed? Me neither.”
• “Night sweats are hot flashes that occur while you’re asleep, because catching on fire during the daytime just isn’t enough.”
• “Today I’m wearing a lovely shade of ‘slept like crap,’ so tread lightly.”

Yes, your sleep might take 48 hours to recover after a single glass of wine. Or you may wake up way after midnight trying to solve all the world’s problems. But persistent sleep disruption is worth discussing with a professional, such as a Midi clinician. Night sweats can be treated. Or there may be underlying sleep disorders at play that should be ruled out, such as obstructive sleep apnea, which becomes more prevalent in menopause. Plus, you can learn about personalized lifestyle changes that can really help.

Period Chaos Quotes for the Unpredictable-Cycle Chapter

Your period has no cares left to give. It arrives when it wants, stays too late, ghosts you for a while, and may still even gives you pregnancy scares. If you want a dose of laughter to make the process feel more manageable, here are some funny perimenopause quotes to keep at bay: 

• “Perimenopause periods: the surprise party you never asked for.”
• “Just when you get used to PMS, they tell ya you’ve got perimenopause.”
• “Perimenopause: the only decade where you can have PMS, anemia, hot flashes, rage, AND still get pregnant. Hormone chaos, meet real life.” –Heather Hirsch, MD
• “Some people sneeze and worry they have flu. When I sneeze, I just pray I don’t pee myself.”

Irregular periods are one of the first symptoms of perimenopause—and if yours are so wildly unpredictable that your calendar app is mad at you, consider it the first sign to talk with your clinician and stay on top of your symptoms. If you have red flag symptoms—such as very heavy bleeding, bleeding after sex, or bleeding after menopause—see a clinician soon to rule out concerning causes.

Funny Menopause Quotes 

The fun doesn’t stop once your period officially disappears and you’re out of perimenopause and officially postmenopausal. These quotes will keep you laughing:

• “My greatest fear is that menopause doesn’t exist and this is the REAL me!”
• “Me: I am going to be really patient and kind today. Menopause: That’s nice. Sending in the loud chewers and heavy breathers at noon.”
• “A study says owning a dog makes you 10 years younger. My first thought was to rescue two more, but I don’t want to go through menopause again.” –Joan Rivers

Menopausal Jokes

Menopause jokes aren’t hard to find. They’ve been around forever, but the difference now is that we’re in charge of the narrative. Honestly, that makes these jokes and quotes funny now.

• “Menopause: puberty’s evil older sister.”
• “Menopause: not old, just resetting my thermostat.”
• “Welcome to menopause: where every day is a heatwave.”

Jokes Aside, Perimenopause Symptoms Need Support 

Laughing so you don’t cry? We can help with that. Yes, menopause is natural and normal—but even when something is a collective experience, that doesn’t mean you need to grit your teeth and get through it. Your symptoms, especially those that significantly disrupt your life, don’t have to be accepted as “just a part of aging.” 

If these quotes feel a little too relatable, Midi clinicians can help you understand what’s going on and find care options that fit your symptoms. They can help with a perimenopause diagnosis and a thorough discussion of your symptom history, age, cycle changes, and underlying medical conditions. 

From there, clinicians can offer hormonal or non-hormonal treatment options, care for symptom relief, and lifestyle support to help you feel your best and protect your health for the long-haul. Every woman’s menopause experience is different, and speaking with a clinician can give you the individualized guidance you need. (And hey—feel free to pass along one or two of these jokes to them!)

Key Takeaways

• Funny perimenopause quotes, memes, and jokes can help you get through the tougher symptoms of menopause. 
• When we read funny quotes, it’s relatable, and we realize that we’re not alone in our menopause experience. 
• Although menopause quotes can make us laugh and bring us together, it doesn’t mean you have to grin and bear it through these symptoms.
• Seek care from a menopause-informed clinician when menopause symptoms interrupt your quality of life, relationship, or ability to work, or when they may point to additional health concerns.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Can perimenopause memes actually help?

Absolutely. Humor can lighten up some of the difficulties and uncomfortable symptoms of menopause. Memes also show that we’re all in this together. 

What are the funniest perimenopause quotes usually about?

Well, there’s a lot of material to choose from. The funniest quotes may be about common symptoms like hot flashes and night sweats, mood shifts, brain fog, a changing libido—and many more. 

When should perimenopause symptoms be taken seriously?

When symptoms affect your quality of life or overall health, then it’s worth seeking care from a menopause-informed specialist, such as a Midi clinician. They can diagnose perimenopause, provide care for symptoms, and talk with you about treatment options that will make a difference in your well-being.